Random Tips

What not to give your Mom for Mother's day

Mother's Day is around the corner, and what does that mean? We start raking our brain for an idea. It seems like moms never give us any clue what they want, and they have everything they need. So here's some tips on what NOT to give your mother for Mother's Day.


1. A new toilet bowl brush.

Pretty sure, if you give your mom a toilet bowl brush she's going to throw poo at you. 

2. Crappy dollar store wrinkle cream

For one, you're calling your mom old and for two, if you're going to buy her wrinkle cream at least spend ten bucks on it. 

3. Dish soap

Don't remind your mom that tomorrow she has a pile of dishes to do. Bad mojo.

4. A video game

Most moms don't want to play Left for Dead, Halo, or Mortal Combat. She deals with enough zombies in the real world. Have you seen yourself in the morning? 

5. Perfume that smells like a skunk.

You all know what I'm talking about. Your mom will feel bad and wear that crappy perfume you bought her. Do the world a favor and   buy her something that doesn't smell like a stink bomb.  

Hope you guys take my advice, and don't buy this stuff. Buy her flowers or something!  

Because everybody needs a bacon lollipop 

Found this little beauty at a local store in my home town. Bacon flavored lollipop, yum city. I didn't actually buy this, but there was also bacon flavored toothpaste there. Pretty amazing if you ask me!

Tips: How bacon is amazing.

1. Bacon makes you happy.

It's a proven fact. The smell of bacon looses endorphin's to your brain that the world is a better place. It makes you smile more and frown less. It's true. 

2. Bacon brings world peace

Because, who can fight when they are eating an armful of bacon? I mean seriously? Think about it. 

3. Bacon makes the world go round.

Without bacon I'm pretty sure Jesus would cry, and the world would stop spinning. It's gotta be true. It's in the bible. (Ha ha not really, please don't check.)

Make the world a happier place and eat some bacon. Also, don't forget to share your bacon with me. Thanks. 

Creating treasure out of trash

So, last year I got it into my head to start collecting beach glass. Every time we'd go to the beach I'd comb the sand for it. The crazy thing is, I found a ton of it, all at the same beach. I was cleaning up our local beach, and I had an idea forming in my head. So, first I painted it. (Look above.) Then, I had an idea in my head of a picture I could create with this glass.

Tips: Creating beautiful things from trash

1. Collect something that is useless

This beach glass seriously was all over the beach. Some kid could have stepped on some of it. It was a hazard! People looked at me weird sometimes while I was constantly picking up glass. A bunch of old ladies collected some because they noticed our beach was so dirty then gave it all to me. :D

2. Get an idea

There are a million DIY projects involving recycled things. Just pick one that you think is awesome and go with it! I got an old picture that I didn't want anymore and found something online.

3. Get to work!

I painted each piece of glass for hours! I had to collect it, wash it, and then paint it. Next I started gluing the glass to my picture. I would watch T.V and work away. Why? Just because!

4. See the treasure instead of the trash.

I think my husband thought I was crazy at times as I tirelessly picked up glass, painted and glued. See the end result of all your hard work. Keep that image in your head. It feels good to recycle something and to make it something amazing! 

5. Show it off!

Show people your treasure when you're all done!

This was my end result of all my beach glass. Yes, this all came from the same beach! This picture, mind you, isn't tiny either. Hope you enjoyed my tips!!

So you're planning a wedding!

I've been there and done that. Eight years ago I got engaged to the most amazing man on the planet. I began wedding plans soon after. Oh boy. Talk about insane. 

Tips for planning a wedding

1. For the love of all that is holy, give yourself at least 6 months to pull this off.

I know, there are times when people just up and get engaged and like a month later get married. To you girls who do that, I say: more power to you. I had 8 months and nearly went crazy. 

2. First things first. Make a list of what you need to buy and do

I had this weird program I had on my computer that told me what I needed to buy and plan. It stressed the crap out of me, but at least it was an organized stress. First thing you're going to want to do is gather a crap ton of chocolate and nail polish. A girl can't function without that. 

3. Breathe

Yes, this is going to be stressful. Just expect it. Even with family, friends and your man helping you it's going to be intense. Just remember it's all worth it in the end! 

4. Do what you want, not what others want

Here's the thing: people have opinions. You better have one too! If you want your bridesmaids to wear neon pink with green stripes and wear floral shoes then by all means go for it. You might have some mad friends, but hey this is your day! Try to organize your thoughts for music, decor, and all that good stuff so you know what you actually want.

5. Try not to buy excess

I ended up not using a bunch of crap I bought. I think I got caught up in stuff and with my mother's help (she liked flowers, bows, and ribbons hee hee) we bought too much. Our wedding was so amazingly beautiful though it didn't matter so much. But, it could save you a hundred bucks.

6. Kiss! 

Don't forget the one you're actually getting married to, goofy! Don't make the wedding plans such a big, hairy deal that you forget the one you're marrying. Remember to take time out of your crazy planning and make out or something.

7. Be a princess for a day

Remember, this is your day! Glitz it out! Make it special! Even if you spend quite a bit of money, this is your Fairy Tale day. Make it amazing. Glitter everything in site. 

List of to dos

1. Pick the date
2. Find the location
3. Find a dress
3. Pick your wedding party and order dresses
4. Find a minister
5. Invitations 
7. Photographer
8. Video person
9. D.J
10. Music for the wedding
11. Flowers
12. Decor for reception and wedding 
13. Wedding Showers
14. Order of service (Do you want someone to sing a special song or have a movie clip?)
15. Guest book (Have someone running this)
16. Caterer 
17. Gifts for Bridesmaids
18. Tuxes
19. Vows
20. Gifts for Groomsmen

I might have forgotten something, but hopefully this list helps you get started! Good luck and congrats!! 

How to be Freakin' Cute

You have to admit, this is a freakin' cute baby. This is my nephew, Lincoln. He is making what we call "the face." We always tell him, "Lincoln make the face!" My little sister (who's now 18) did the same thing! We would tell her, "Kali make the face!" she then would ball up her fists and get a big goofy smile on her face. I love this about babies. They just wanna get you to laugh. As adults, our one goal with a baby is what? To make them laugh! This little guy above was my challenge. When he was an infant he was one of those "serious" babies who just observed his surroundings all the time. It was my challenge every time I held him to make him giggle. I finally found a niche. I sang to him the most random, silly, song I could muster, and I got a smile and then another! I found it!

Tips from a baby Lincoln 

1. Laugh at stupid stuff.

You have to admit adults do some really stupid stuff to make a baby laugh. Have you ever watched the adult more than the baby? It's so hilarious! We will make raspberries,  take in funny voices, or stand on our head, just to make a giggle come out of the kid. 

2. Do what you enjoy over and over

Do you ever notice this with a baby? My little nephew up above does high fives. He also does what we call, "pound it." We put our fists out, and he pounds it with his little fist. Then you make an explosion sound, and he smiles. He will do this over and over and try and find the next person to "pound it."

3. Stand in buckets, be silly, and be active.

Stand in a bucket? This is one of Lincoln's favorite things to do at church. I sing on the worship team, so we watch as Lincoln runs around as we practice our singing. He loves to climb in the offering buckets. It's one of his things. We will stand there laughing our heads off as this little dude stands up on this little wooden box and shakes the pulpit, climbs into the offering bucket, or drinks our water. It's really funny to watch.

Hope you enjoyed my tips from baby Lincoln

What If You Could Poop Rainbows? 
Wouldn't the world be a prettier place?

I think, if unicorns were real and there were rainbows and glitter all over the place admit it, the world would be a prettier place. 

Tips from the Unicorn

1. Make the world prettier

I know, you're probably thinking I can't poop rainbows and barf glitter. How do I impact the world around me? Plant a tree, pick up a piece of garbage, kiss a squirrel. Do something! 

2. Frolic through the flowers once and awhile

Take time from your Facebook, Twitter, Reddit  Pinterest and just go frolicing. Heck, it'd be fun.

3. Eat sugar

I'm not saying eat like two thousand pounds of sugar here. Just, dark chocolate, ice-cream, and a slice of cake will improve your mood once in awhile. 

Be a unicorn for the day! Just don't stab anyone! 


Why So Serious?

I have always been a fan of batman, always. When I was a kid me and my brother were hard core batman, superman, spiderman fans. It was just amazing fun to sit there and dress up like a superhero and fly around the house or jump on everything. Pretty sure we had too much sugar as kids. You can take life lessons from people like the Joker. Wait, a second? You mean stab people with pencils? Well, no. But, you can take his motto to heart. Why so serious? People go through life whining, complaining, and dragging their feet like their gold fish died every five seconds. Here's a few tips how to take life a bit like the joker.

1. Randomly laugh at stuff.

Have you ever seen the joker? He laughs at absolutely everything! For one he's insane. But, still he is out to laugh his head off.

2. Be entertained by someone or something

Let little stuff or people entertain you. Joker didn't really want to kill batman. He just liked to play jokes on him, even if it would blow his head off.

3. Ask yourself: How often is a smile on my face?

Let's put a smile on that face! Okay, not trying to get creepy here, but do you know it takes less muscles to smile than frown. At least that's what someone once told me. 

Why so serious? Be a goofball once and awhile! 

No comments:

Post a Comment